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Euthanasia: Understanding the Right Time for a Compassionate Choice

Euthanasia is often considered when a pet’s quality of life is poor and their suffering outweighs the potential benefits of continued palliative care or natural death.

We firmly believe in the idea that humane euthanasia is appropriate not during a “moment” of time, but during a “window” of time. The reason for this is simple. Owners are often told, “You will know when it’s time” or “Your pet will let you know”. There is a lot of pressure not to get it “wrong”. However, while there certainly are circumstances where euthanasia is not ethically justified (e.g. convenience), there is a much wider range of appropriate circumstances than commonly discussed. 

Let’s consider other life-changing decisions – like getting married or a move. While there certainly are better times to embark on these endeavors, usually these are wider windows. A week or even a month difference in the planning of these events may seem really drastic at the time, but down the road and looking back, the exact day the event occurred matters less and less.  What matters the most, is being prepared and flexible when undertaking any life-changing event, and choosing to say goodbye to your pet is no different.

The reality is that without proper education and support, owners often struggle to know when it is time. This is why learning how to assess your pet’s quality of life properly is so important. It gives you a data-driven approach and even more importantly, allows you to track their quality of life over time so you can see in what ways and how quickly it is changing.

You can find a lot of good quality, free, quality-of-life assessments online. The one we use for all of our clients can be found at this link. Additionally, if you feel as though having an opinion from a veterinarian would provide comfort and some peace of mind, we do offer in-home quality-of-life consultations where Dr. Kendra will come to your home, examine your pet, and discuss your assessment with you.

In our work with owners, it is extremely rare for someone tell us that they “wish they would have done it later”, but we routinely hear them say that they “wish they would have done it sooner”. This is a further testament to the challenge that is faced in determining exactly when the right time is to make such a heart-wrenching decision. Love and grief are somewhat protective in this way. When you approach this decision out of love for them and to spare them suffering, in our experience, the love that is there helps to protect you from making the decision “too soon” because we naturally want to avoid the pain of losing the love in that relationship. 

Regardless of when you make the decision, please allow yourself some grace and compassion. The decision to euthanize is one of the hardest decisions we make as pet owners and it is commonplace to struggle with feelings of guilt or as if you are “playing god”. It’s important to remember that you are not making the decision to have your pet die. Their disease, age, or illness has made that decision. You are simply choosing what their death will look like. By electing euthanasia you are choosing to take back some control over the death and dying process ensuring that your pet has a passing that can bring with it as much peace (as is possible) for both you and them. 

Below are some common questions we hear regarding how to determine if it is time to euthanize a pet and our response to them.

As you go through these questions please know that every situation is different, and if something does not sit right, we are here to support you and help you work through these struggles. You are not in this alone. It can be overwhelming, but the fact that you are even reading this page and considering euthanasia demonstrates the immense amount of love and compassion you have for your pet. By wrestling with this decision you are choosing to take on some of the suffering your pet would have to experience in order for this decision to be easy. We’d challenge anyone to show us a greater act of love than that.

Finally, again, please know that we are here to support you in whatever way we can.

Common Questions

We often hear owners say that they would prefer if their pet died naturally on their own. We understand this sentiment. Making the decision is so incredibly gut-wrenching that it is only normal that we wish we did not have to make it. 

A “natural” death refers to the process of allowing a pet to pass away on their own, without human intervention to hasten the process. This approach is based on the belief that nature should take its course, and the pet should be allowed to die when their body is ready.

 

  • Duration: The timing of a natural death is unpredictable. The process can take days, weeks, or even months, depending on the pet’s condition. Some pets pass quickly, while others may linger in a state of discomfort. 
  • Timeframe: In addition, most owners are not able to spend twenty-four hours a day with their pet seven days a week. A natural death can occur at any time, and there is a risk the pet could pass alone while you are away or asleep. While this might be alright for some situations, if there is evidence the pet passed traumatically, many owners often feel large amounts of guilt that they were not present to offer what comfort they could.
  • Potential for suffering: A natural death can sometimes involve prolonged periods of discomfort, depending on the nature of the illness. While some pets may appear peaceful, others might experience difficulty breathing, restlessness, confusion/fear, starvation, or pain. Aside from the potential for suffering for your pet, it can also be incredibly difficult or even traumatic to witness.
  • Owner responsibility: Choosing a natural death often requires careful monitoring and hands-on care. Owners must be vigilant about their pet’s condition and be prepared to manage symptoms like incontinence, dehydration, or respiratory distress which can be a struggle without proper veterinary care. 

Some pet owners prefer the idea of fnatural death, believing it allows their pets to die with dignity on their own terms, and that is okay. However, if choosing this route, it is crucial to consult with your veterinarian to ensure that the pet’s quality of life is prioritized and that their pain is effectively managed. Additionally, if you elect to pursue a “natural” death for your pet it’s imperative that you have a plan in place should you notice them beginning to suffer. With the increased demands placed upon the veterinary field post-COVID-19, it may be difficult or impossible to get same-day care short of going to an emergency room. Even then, some emergency rooms are turning away clients due to the demands placed on them. As unfortunate as this is, it is a reality that many pet owners find themselves forced to face.

Electing euthanasia allows more control over the manner and sensations present during in dying process. It also allows for more flexibility for the owner and other friends and family to be present, if desired. However, you are the best judge as to what is best for you and your pet.

The intake of food and water are some of the body’s most basic life-sustaining functions. When those processes shut down, and the cause of that can’t be attributed to some acute illness, it is a clear sign that your pet may be in the “active” phase of the dying process meaning that death may be imminent. The intake of food and water should not be the sole determining factor as to if it is time to euthanize. We encourage a more holistic approach and to consider your pet’s quality of life overall. Again, the quality of life assessment can be of great benefit in that if you are struggling.

There is a common phenomenon in the natural dying process called the “rally”. We often see this in humans as well during the final days of their lives. For your pet, it may mean that suddenly they seem as if they are “back to their old self”. Maybe they are eating and drinking again. Maybe they are playing in ways that they haven’t played in months or years. This can, understandably, be so incredibly confusing to you as the owner. Does this mean that you shouldn’t euthanize? 

It is important to recognize that “rallies” can be very short-lived (even a day or two) and you may find that your pet can quickly go downhill. We are big believers in the idea that you should do what is best for you and your pet, which is why we refuse to charge any cancellation fees or take appointment deposits. 

However, our biggest piece of caution is just the understanding that should your pet take a turn for the worse, you may be left scrambling trying to find the necessary care to end your pet’s suffering, which can be very traumatic to you. While we do everything we can to meet urgent appointment requests, there are times when we physically cannot able to help, as our appointment slots do fill up quickly.

While technically, yes, euthanasia does mean that you are helping your pet to die before their body reaches its own physical limits, it is important to keep in mind some context. Oftentimes, that timeframe can be described in days and maybe weeks, not necessarily months and years. Remember, the timeframe where euthanasia is appropriate is a window, not a moment. Each owner has to figure out where they fall in that window. Some owners would prefer to wait to get as much time with their pets as they can, and some would prefer to do it sooner to guarantee a minimization of suffering. Generally speaking, the later you are in the window, the greater the chance of something “sudden” happening that can be distressing for both you and your pet.  

The other thing that cannot be over-looked is that part of what makes life worth living is not simply the number of minutes our heart keeps beating, but rather the experiences we have. We encourage considering what you want your pet’s last days/weeks/months to look like as part of end-of-life planning. We have many owners that choose to create a “bucket-list” to share with their pet before their passing.  If a pet is experiencing unrelenting pain or fear/confusion, are those moments worth experiencing? We cannot answer this question for you, and unfortunately our pets cannot tell us their wishes, but we believe you are fully capable and perfectly positioned to make the most loving decision possible.

First, it’s important to understand that this decision is one that is made completely out of love, and waiting until this decision is “easy” would mean that inevitably a pet would have to experience a certain level of suffering. Throughout the duration of your pet’s life, you have made decisions that are in their best interest and done so with their ultimate well-being in mind. This decision is only an extension of that. You aren’t betraying your pet by electing euthanasia, in fact, you are doing quite the opposite. You are giving them the gift of ensuring that their inevitable passing is one surrounded by those who love them the most and occurs in the most comfortable way possible.

Both of these are incredibly difficult situations. One is not easier to deal with than the other. When considering euthanasia, and assessing quality of life, it is important to consider your pet’s life experience as a whole. Additionally, it is also important to consider each pet’s unique personality. Say you have a pet who is always game for whatever it is that you want to do, regardless of how much discomfort it causes them. For these animals, waiting until their buoyant spirits are impacted likely means that they have had to suffer a great deal. Likewise, a pet that is frightened and confused can start to show physical signs of distress (e.g. aggression, house-soiling, decreased appetite, etc). 

Either way, having a physical body that is functioning normally, and a mental state free of anxiety or confusion are essential to a good quality of life. Dysfunction in either can cause severe suffering and pain. You can’t have one, but not the other. Both are equally important. It is all a matter of severity, and that is where assessing all aspects of a pet’s life are crucial.

Our pets make a large impact on our lives, and that impact can extend beyond even that of the immediate family. It is normal when considering euthanasia to hope that your pet can make it to some event (i.e through the holidays, after the kids graduate, until family members are available to attend the euthanasia, etc). We often find that owners over-estimate the time their pet has left. We, ourselves, have experienced this with one of our own pets and were left scrambling trying to make quick adjustments to our plan. No one wants to say goodbye. It is commonplace to wish for one more…whatever (day at the beach, camping trip, Thanksgiving, etc). The earlier you are in the window of time where euthanasia is appropriate, the more likely it is that your best laid plans will work out the way they are envisioned.

However, it is always important to keep in mind that the priority should be your pet’s current quality of life. There are always ways we can help ensure family members who want to be there can be, such as attending the procedure virtually, should the need arise. Delaying increases the chances that the decision and ability to control the experience may be taken out of your hands. That does not mean you have to do it immediately, but rather it is important to call attention to the denial that happens when we do not want to experience the loss of a loved one, and make the best decision available at the time.

Aside from giving yourself grace and compassion as you navigate this process, our biggest advice is to encourage you to develop an end-of-life care plan for your pet. You can not stop the eventual death of your pet, but you can plan for it, and hope is not a plan. By developing a plan you take back some control over this process and ensure that your pet has the kind of end-of-life experience that you want for them while allowing yourself the space to simply be “present”.